i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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