you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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