sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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