First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
