i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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