soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
