my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
