"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
