would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
