Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
