The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
I will be naked everywhere
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
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