I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
