I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Randomize
