Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
