This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
