She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
barbara walters just said penis...
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
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