Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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