So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
