My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
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