none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
