your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize
