I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
