i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Randomize
