i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Success! We fucked roommates!
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Randomize
