Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
