y did u give ur computer a hand job?
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
