the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
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