just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
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