I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Drake has all the answers
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
