bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Randomize
