But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Just high enough for therapy.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
