if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
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