ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Randomize
