Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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