I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
