Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
they need to just BURY HIM!
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
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