I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Randomize