it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Randomize
