Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
