More tranny stories later!
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Randomize
