No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
