He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Randomize
