you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
