Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
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