I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
