I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
