Pregnant stripper...not hot.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
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