he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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