that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
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