you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
