i jhust puked up my retainher.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
FUCK WHALES
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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