Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
